Batshiat Crazy Harry: City should pull out of United Nations, gays need to talk to God

In a 'Live from the Community Center' webcast feed last night, Batshiat Crazy Harry invented a whole new psychotic political dilemma. According to Harbhajan Singh Ahluwalia, better known to locals as city council candidate Harry Walia, the city paid $3,500 earlier this year to join the United Nations.

Ahluwalia promised that if he is elected, he will pull the city out of the U.N., which he said is run by the same kind of communists that are running the city. He further compounded this lunacy by stating that the U.N.'s headquarters should be moved to Cuba.

It was the defining comedy moment of an otherwise incredibly dull and poorly attended candidate rally. Ahluwalia rented out the Venice Community Center and invited the public and his supporters, however his mailed out fliers stated the so-called "town hall meeting" would take place on Wednesday, October 20. The meeting actually took place on Tuesday, October 20.

Approximately 30 people attended, most from the south county Republican club, which made the vast pan shots of the community center look astonishingly empty. This was augmented by online viewers in the first-ever live webcast of a local political event. Online viewers numbered as high as 7 at one point. Two of those online viewers were myself and current Taxpayers League prez Gary Budway, while the rest seemed to be from the community center itself as the live feed panned the crowd to show several Young Republicans from Sarasota watching Harry on laptops and iPhones.

When it came to the online Q&A, only Budway and I gave him any questions. Budway and I were talking on the phone throughout the online show, which crashed several times during the feed from connection failures at the community center.

Posing as "Jean," Budway asked about the proposal to use the city's portion of one-cent sales tax revenue to fund an entertainment venue at the high school on county land. Ahluwalia winged it by stating that he would prefer some kind of public-private partnership, apparently unaware that in the current squabble, the one-cent tax is the proposed public portion of funding in a proposed ad hoc public-private partnership fiasco.

Posing as "Raoul Duke" (apparently nobody at the rally reads, as that nick should have been a dead giveaway), I first asked what Walia was going to do about that web nut that is cyber stalking him. That caused a smiley to be sent back to me by the web-feed's admin, but the question was never put to Walia. Later, I asked, "As a gay man, what does Mr. Walia plan on doing about fair housing rights for gay retirees in Venice?"

Not that this is a local problem that I am aware of as Venice has a huge gay retiree population and very few people are dumb enough to mess with a consumer group that large. I just wanted to see if Walia would say something stupid. To my delight, he did.

"Oooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh," Walia groaned heavily, staring down at his shoes after the question was posed to him. Budway and I immediately burst into laughter. "Look, I am only running for city council, not for the President of the United States. Everyone is equal in my eyes, whatever you do is between you and God. Does that answer your question, Raoul?" That last bit was spoken directly into the camera.

So communists are running city hall and the United Nations, Venice is now a voting nation at the U.N., which needs to be moved to Cuba, and gays should be dealing with God about any housing issues that they might have.

What a delightfully trippy mind -- a naturalized immigrant with xenophobia and homophobia. How is that even possible?